4 Ways to Help Your Neurodivergent Child Build Social Connections

We all want our children to have healthy friendships and experience healthy, fulfilling social connections, but this can be a little bit challenging if your child is neurodivergent.

Neurodivergent children, such as those with autism, ADHD, or other developmental conditions, may face challenges with social connections due to differences in communication styles, sensory processing, and understanding social cues. However, it's essential to recognise that each child is unique, and their experiences vary widely.

To help you navigate this journey, we've pulled together four ways to support you in helping your neurodivergent child build social connections, so they can confidently interact with others in a way that feels comfortable and natural.

1. Work around their interests

A great way to encourage your child to have social interactions is to try basing them around your child's interests. What are your child's favourite hobbies, games or activities? Can you create opportunities to socialise around these? Doing so makes the action much less stressful and a lot more enjoyable, as your child can focus on something they really love and feel confident doing.

You can try organising play dates based on your child's favourite pastimes and then invite children from your neighbourhood or school. For example, if your child loves building with LEGO, you could organise a LEGO-themed playdate where they and their friends work together to create something fun. Alternatively, if they enjoy drawing or painting, consider hosting a small art session and inviting other children to join in. These types of activities provide a comfortable environment for socialising while fostering shared interests.

Always remember to praise any efforts they make, no matter how small. Your positive reinforcement will boost their confidence and encourage them to continue.

2. Seek out small dedicated neurodivergent specific groups

When building social confidence in a neurodivergent child, it's best to start with smaller, more manageable groups, so as to not overwhelm your child and to help them feel more at ease.

Besides putting together play dates based around interests, you could look to seek out small social groups or community events that are designed specifically for neurodivergent children. By catering specifically for neurodivergent children, these groups can provide a safe and structured environment where your child can practice interacting with others at their own pace, surrounded by peers who share similar experiences.

One way to discover community events tailored for neurodivergent children is by connecting with local support organisations or advocacy groups. These groups often host events, workshops, and meet-ups designed to foster social interactions in a safe and inclusive setting.

For instance, you could reach out to your area's autism or ADHD support network, where they may offer details about sensory-friendly movie screenings, group outings, or activity-based clubs. Schools and therapists may also have recommendations for events or programs tailored to your child's needs.

It's worth keeping in mind that large, noisy events, such as birthday parties, can be quite overstimulating for neurodivergent children. In this situation, it can be beneficial to start gradually by attending for a short period during the initial visits. Over time, you can gradually increase the duration of each visit, allowing your child to adjust at their own pace and build confidence in the new environment.

3. Try role playing

Role playing is an excellent way for you to practice every day social situations with your child, in a safe and relaxed environment. Choose a calm, low-pressure moment when they're in a playful mood and not occupied with other activities.

Start with scenarios they're likely to encounter, such as greeting someone, sharing toys with other children, celebrating special occasions or asking for help. For example, you could role-play attending a birthday party by pretending to be the "birthday person." Encourage your child to practice greeting you, saying "happy birthday," and presenting a gift. This hands-on activity allows your child to familiarise themselves with common social behaviours in a fun and low-pressure way, helping them feel more prepared for real-life interactions.

For neurodivergent children, reading social cues and self-regulating impulses and emotions can sometimes be challenging. Quiet, one-on-one practice moments at home are ideal for teaching important skills like recognising body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice. These lessons can also include understanding empathy and seeing situations from another person's perspective, helping them understand social dynamics more effectively.

By supporting children and giving them practical tools, supportive guidance, and a deeper understanding of social interactions, you empower them to approach unpredictable social situations with more confidence.

4. Utilise social stories

You may be wondering, "What are social stories?" Social stories are thoughtfully-designed resources that have been created to help them navigate social interactions - sort of like an instruction manual! They depict different social situations and explain important social cues and offer practical suggestions on how to respond appropriately. for each scenario.

For example, a social story about joining a group activity might show a character observing the group, waiting for a natural pause, and then saying, "Can I join in?" This step-by-step approach helps children practice and feel more confident in similar real-life situations.

We encourage you to explore the background of social stories further and review the many options available to find the most suitable ones for your child. You can learn more about social stories and view examples over on the Twinkl website.

It can take time to form friendships. Throughout the journey of helping your child build social connections, it's imperative that you remain supportive and provide encouragement and praise. Considering that children often learn by observation, give thought to how you could also model positive social behaviour yourself by showing them how to interact with others.

By utilising a combination of approaches and providing support, you can proactively help your child gain social confidence, setting them up for a lifetime of meaningful relationships.