Preparing Your Child for Nursery
When the time comes for your child to start at nursery, it can be a time of mixed emotions - for you and for them. We look at what you can do in the run-up to their first day to make the transition as easy as possible.
Starting at nursery is a big step forward. There'll be new things to learn, new rules to follow and new friends and adventures ahead. Your child may feel nervous and anxious - and you may do too - as they prepare for a bigger, wider, world without you there every step of the way.
Ahead of that first big day however, there are lots of things you can do to help your child make the best possible start. The following ideas should help make the transition easier - and a lot more fun.
Let's Pretend...
To get your child used to the idea of nursery, try play-acting the different things involved. Everyday activities you can pretend to do include saying goodbye to each other, and hello again too (for when you see them again). Children love routine - and routines too - so getting them used to a goodbye sequence now can help them better understand and be prepared.
You can also act out other practical steps such as taking off and hanging up a coat, and putting it on again - and also answering their on a register - perhaps you can persuade other children, adults or even pets to join in as their names are read out! You can also practise sitting nicely, and lying down to take a nap. Reading stories and singing songs together is also a great idea and you may well already have some favourites that you both enjoy.
Put Them in the Picture
Why not read some books together which show how others adapt to their first days at nursery? Most children like to hear the same stories again and again, and so with such books you can introduce and establish reassuring stories. You can talk about the story together and how the characters are feeling. Examples of picture books you could try include Spot Loves Nursery and Peppa Pig: George's First Day at Playgroup although are many others too.
Thrills, Spills and New Skills
Once your child is at nursery, mastery of - or at least some practice at - certain basic skills will really beneficial. Some of these may already be things your child can do - hanging up their coat, removing a backpack, taking out a lunch-box, fastening shoes - others may need a little more work. To get them used to doing things efficiently, you can have a 'pretend' race to see who can do the task first.
Play in Advance
The nursery may well offer - but if not, do ask - for you to visit them with your child ahead of them starting. This will help them feel more at ease and confident in what will become their new surroundings ahead of joining and thus help reduce any concerns. Touring the school with your child can be helpful, as can having the opportunity to play in the playground - perhaps once or twice - before the big day arrives. Such exposure can really help your child should become comfortable and confident about what will be their new environment.
Listen for Their Concerns
It's only natural that your child might be concerned about starting nursery. Be sure to listen to any questions they ask or fears they have. They may be worried about what the teacher will be like, or even whether you - or whoever is to collect them - will remember to be there! Encourage them to share what they are feeling so that you can help them to think through how to deal with any worries. Reassure them that it's normal to feel a little scared and that lots of people can feel that way.
Familiar Favourites
Let your child choose a special blanket or toy animal with them. Taking a familiar and loved favourite item can really help them make the transition from home to nursery, and help with nap times too. You may want to steer them away from taking their absolute favourite in case it gets mislaid or damaged. Buying a new special toy may help - and you might be able to buy a second 'spare' as a back-up too!
A nice little project to combat fears of loneliness might be to make a small picture book with photos of family members, pets, etc and happy times together that they can also have in their bag at school.
Look out for Non-verbal Messages
Given that your child may not be fully able to explain what they are worried about, do watch for non-verbal signals. Outside of your pretend play, you may spot your child acting out their concerns in other ways: perhaps by becoming more clingy, or withdrawn, or even being more aggressive. Sometimes there can be some behavioural regression - a potty-trained child may start to have toileting accidents, or they may want you to help them dress or feed themselves even though you thought you were beyond these stages. Try not to be too frustrated by situations like these should they occur, it won't last forever, and negative attention can just 'feed' the behaviour, rather than let it disappear naturally.
The Final Countdown
Well ahead of the first day - perhaps two weeks before your child is due to begin - start practising with what will be your child's new bedtime, especially if e.g. they have been going to bed later during the summer holidays. It's especially important that they get a good night's sleep before that first day, but - unless they really want to talk about it - don't obsess over talking about too much. Keep things nice and natural, soothing and relaxed.
Make It a 'Good' Goodbye
On the first day, you may want to plan in a little extra time to stay and check that they are settling in and that you can leave without any tears or turnarounds. The nursery may well encourage you to explore the classroom with your child as they mix with others and settle in with new toys or a activity, or they may prefer you to say goodbye and make a clean break. Whichever way it goes, try not to just disappear and hope for the best: now's the time to put your 'saying goodbye' practise into action. You may want to alert a teacher that you are about to leave so that they can support your child if needed when you go. Remember to keep it positive - and try not to turn back once you've left, since it may only reinforce the message that your child will only be okay if you are there with them. Be assured that the nursery staff will be used to every situation and will do all they can to ensure as seamless a transition for both you and your child.
It's a Big Step Forward!
Beginning at nursery is something new - and hopefully exciting - for both you and your child. It's a big step forward but one you can - and will - take successfully, together. You may find the idea of being separated really hard, or you may be excited about this step forward for both of you. Or something in between! However you feel about it, remember that your child will succeed with your support, nurturing, encouragement and patience.
And Finally...
The above suggestions are just that: suggestions. There is no right and wrong way to go about it, so don't be surprised - or upset - if your child trots off happily without so much as a wave goodbye, or needs a little extra support to settle in.
However you go about preparing your child for nursery, try to do so in a relaxed, fuss-free way so that your child is excited - rather than worried - about what lies ahead.
